Watch me be tl;dr

So I didn't think I'd talk about Mr. Brendon-gate, but apparently I am.

Not cutting, because your layouts will be fine tomorrow(1/9/08) morning.

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I was taling to

saline_joy about this, and some of this is taken from a comment thread we had.

I first want to clear up a vocab word or two that will come up.

Porn = wherin for values of porn, we take that to mean "stuff about people having sex"

Pornfiction = wherin for values of porn, we take that to mean "stuff about people having sex, with varying levels of romantic sappiness thrown in"

We write porn, yes, but we also write love stories, and there's a difference in the two.

~~

I just... it frustrates me that it's "ok" for young adult dudes to act like that.

Being informed only from things like Anal Adventures IV and last months' issue of Cosmo does not excuse crappy, douchey behavior.

I love porn and pornfiction but its crap at teaching intrapersonal relations and things like using lube and asking please before facials happen.

Porn shouldn't be how people learn the workings of sex, but because Western socioety in general and America as a whole is so freaked about sex ed(how to both put a condom on and talk to each other the morning after) for minors, we don't.

The fact that Ryan snips at Jac's photography while doing the same thing shows us something.

The fact that Pete makes thinly veiled comments about every girl he's ever been with shows us something(Ashlee's dieting issues{She means to me what i mean to Rap, check his blogspot for that header}, Jaenae).

The fact that people dismiss the "scene queens" but laud the male versions of them is really telling, perhaps most of all.

Seriously. Pete is dating Ashlee who is more famous than he is and I'm sure the added publicity for his band, DD and gross looking clothing line(said while wearing some of it) isn't keeping him up at night.

And yet its girls who are called "star fuckers".

Ryan internet stalked both Jac and Pete before they dated and signed his band. It may be the internet, but stalking is still stalking.

That emo is actually very hyper-masculine wherew girls are groupies, song material and muses is still unacceptable, guyliner or not.

Which leads to another thing: girls in bands.

Hayley Williams from Paramore, Alicia(techs count), Greta from The Hushies, Amanda Plamer, Lyn Z & Kitty from MSI. Ashlee's a solo pop star, but she goes here as well.

Where is the fic for them, exactly? Theres more about Brian, and Matt Cortez and Zack than even Greta.

I have problems with Hayley's outlook(Once a whore, you're nothing more, I'm sorry that'll never change - from Misery Business. She's trapped in the same whore/bride dichotemy that Ryan and Pete are.) on this meta actually, but still.

I'm sick of this huge gaping chest wound of a double standard in my music and in the larger world.

Brendon's dochey please-let-someone-kick-him-in-the-neck behaviour is only a symptom of this.

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From:

queenofhell.livejournal.com

Oh, god, yes honey! Word times a million.

The thing about people sniping at the scene queens for being shallow and fucked up and fame-whorey is...well, what does it say about these dudes if those are the kinds of girls they like? Why do people view them as victims of these women instead of grown-ass men who deliberately pursue the same type of women (Brendon: scene queens who pride themselves on "trashiness", Ryan: pretty blonde chicks who like to be photographed)? Like, I don't love Jac and Audrey (I do find them pretty entertaining, though) but the thing is...Brendon and Ryan chose to date them. If fangirls hate Jac and Audrey and Keltie and Lana, they should be asking themselves what these girlfriends say about the dudes who choose to date them.

And god, yeah. As tacky as it is to talk shit about your famous ex, how tacky is it for Ryan to call out Jac in an interview and question her photography (as though Ryan gets to say what art is or isn't, and also, she's twenty years old; not everyone gets their pretty ass handed a record contract at 17, Ryan)? How tacky is it for Pete to write blogs that are obviously about Ashlee and Jeanae? It definately goes both ways, but when the guys do it they're viewed so much more sympathetically.

Regarding the fic thing...I think part of it is that a lot of people in fandom would rather read pornfiction about boys, and part of it is that interest in fic correlates a lot to interest in music--I mean, the boy Hushies get about as much fanfic as Greta does (very little), and Lyn Z gets waaaay more fanfic than any of the guys in MSI. Amanda Palmer gets no love in fic, but neither does the dude in her band whose name I don't even know. Same with Hayley and the dudes in Paramore whose names I also don't know (and yeah, that "whore" line bothers me a lot too. Not to mention she's like uber-Christian). There's also a correlation between exposure in the media and fic, I think--the dudes we write about most are the ones who get publicized the most, or who we get to know through their own blogs and the FOE videos and such.

I also think a lot of that has to do with sexism, though. Girls can't reveal as much of themselves, can't be as complex and funny and interesting and revealing as dudes are, because they'd get judged like hell for it. With the girls I do have an interest in writing (Vicky T and Ashlee), the thing is, they reveal so little about themselves. With Vicky I think it might just be her personality--the Guilty Pleasure video obviously shows she has a sense of humor, and she always seems fun in the candid photos, but she doesn't really talk or do much on camera--she seems much more comfortable behind the camera. And Ashlee's image is so constructed that she never seems particularly genuine in interviews.

I do think that for a fandom populated primarily with dude "characters" though, girls are getting a good amount of attention in fic, moreso than a lot of other fandoms, actually.

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I took the one less traveled by,

Watch me be tl;dr

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